Fire and Ice
by quicksilversquared
Summary: Winter brings with it snow and ice-covered sidewalks, and so a ice removal contest isn't far behind. At first glance it seemed like a typical challenge between Alix and Kim- and then Kim brought out the fire.


With the first snows that fell on Paris came the ice. Sidewalks got icy, especially after the first thaw and re-freeze. The citizens of Paris took to their walks to chip and salt the ice to make their walkways safe.

And of course, Kim took the opportunity to pose a challenge to Alix.

"I bet I can get the ice off the sidewalk faster," Kim bragged at school. He flexed his arms. "Your puny little arms have no chance."

Alix scowled at him. "I have _lean_ muscle. It's better than your overinflated monster arms. I have more _endurance._ "

Kim arched an eyebrow and smirked. "And why would endurance matter then you're going for speed? I _suppose_ that if you wanted to chip all day, then _maybe_ endurance would come in handy. But I said I could do it _faster_."

"You would chip at the ice for a minute and then get tired," Alix challenged, planting her hands on her waist and cocking a hip.

"I'd get the ice off _smarter_ ," Kim shot back. "You would probably do teensy-weensy little pieces at a time, just like your teensy-weensy little arms."

Alix rolled her eyes. "There's no _smarts_ needed to get ice off sidewalks and if there were, you'd be the slowest ice-chipper in the city."

Kim got in her face. " _Prove_ it. Ice-removal contest, today, after school."

"You're on."

* * *

"Okay, show me these smarts," Alix challenged as they stood in front of Kim's home. They had chosen it because it was out of the way- they wouldn't have to stop for pedestrians walking by- and because there was a decent amount of ice there. Kim's house wasn't _anywhere_ as big as Adrien's, but it was larger than the apartments that most of the other students lived in and even had a short driveway. Alix and Kim had approached Adrien earlier in the day hoping that he would offer up his courtyard for their ice-removal contest, but Adrien had crushed their hopes. Even if his bodyguard hadn't already removed the ice, he explained, his father wouldn't take too kindly to all of them piling in to watch Alix and Kim. They would get booted out in a minute.

So they had to go with the second-best option.

Kim shook his head. "Nope. Not a chance, shorty. I'm not going to give away my ice-removal secrets. You go first and see what little damage you can do with those teeny arms, and _then_ I'll do my thing."

"Wait a second," Max cut in before Alix could retort or jump the gun and start smashing ice. He adjusted his glasses. "How are we going to know when someone's done their half? It seems to me that eyeballing it could result in one person doing several percentage points more of the ice coverage than the other person, which could result in a significant difference in the amount of time spent removing ice, which in turn could throw off the results."

There was a pause as the class thought about it.

"We can measure the ice," Rose suggested. "It fills pretty much the entire sidewalk and your driveway and has pretty straight edges from where your neighbors finished. We just need to find the middle and chip a split in the middle."

"Does anyone have a tape measure?" Nino asked, and soon Marinette and Juleka were kneeling on the sidewalk, measuring the giant sheet of ice covering Kim's sidewalk and driveway.

"If we chip six centimeters from that end, the middle of the driveway will be dead center," Marinette announced once they finished, pointing to one end of the ice sheet. "And then we can chip the dividing line."

"I'll do that," Ivan volunteered. He was holding the ice pick, after all, and it wouldn't take him long. It was a wonder that Kim hadn't challenged him, though it was possible that Kim had given up trying to challenge Ivan after Ivan stopped paying attention to him. Alix was _much_ easier to rile up, to the surprise of absolutely no one. "Just, like, lay a twig down at the edge of where I need to cut to and I'll do it."

There was a rush as Marinette measured out the cut and Juleka found the twig. Ivan annihilated the ice on the end as the rest of the class carefully marked out the center, supervised by Max. It took another ten minutes to get that done and the center strip carefully chipped out, during which the whole class sent nervous looks at the setting sun. It was going to get pretty dark soon, so Alix and Kim would have to really move it once they got started so that they weren't stuck in the dark and so no one would be forced to leave mid-competition by parents calling them home.

Max cleared his throat as everyone made their way up the driveway. "Okay. So rules of the competition: All ice must be removed for the timer to stop. Chunks of ice must be pushed off the sidewalk and driveway for the task to considered complete. Contestants can use whatever tools they deem fit, and will have all tools picked out before starting as to not throw the results due to having to search through Kim's family's messy garage. Due to the lack of replicas of each tool, we will go one at a time and time each person using my stopwatch. Whoever clears the ice in the least amount of time is the winner. Prizes are yet to be determined, though both parties agree that they will do whatever is asked of them should they lose."

Both Alix and Kim nodded, and Alix vanished into the garage to pull out two shovels, then reclaimed the ice chipping bar from Ivan. Kim pulled out some things as well, though he kept them hidden under a tarp on his side of the ice. He looked rather smug about the whole ordeal.

"All right, Alix, you go first," Max said once the class had assembled at the top of the driveway. Alya had her trusty phone out to record, though doubtless she was going to have to do some major editing so that anyone watching wouldn't have to sit through nearly a half-hour (or more) of ice-chipping. "Ready?"

Alix adjusted her grip on the ice chipper and gave a sharp nod. "Ready."

"All right. Three...two...one... _go!_ "

Alix positively flew. Ice chips sprayed up into the air as she gouged holes and lines in the ice, and the whole class cheered when a large chunk came loose. She kicked it to the side and it landed on the snow, safely off of the driveway.

There were more cheers.

Alix showed no signs of tiring as she plowed her way down towards the end of the driveway. More large chunks were flying free with every other hit, but they were still ticking ever closer to ten minutes.

"I'll be _way_ faster," Kim bragged as he watched, crossing his arms. " _This_ strategy of getting ice off the driveway is so outdated and slow."

"You talk big now, but we'll see who's laughing later!" Alix called as she dropped her ice chipping bar and grabbed the shovel to clear the driveway before she chipped the ice off of the short section of sidewalk that had been assigned to her.

"She's going to be exhausted when she's finished," Adrien said as another shovelful of ice pieces flew through the air and into the snow. Strands of hair clung to Alix's face and neck, stained dark from sweat. "Someone brought water, right?"

"I brought juice," Rose offered, beaming. "And cookies! They'll be hungry."

"And I'm sure Kim's parents have water and food if we ask," Alya pointed out, edging down the newly cleared driveway as Alix finished clearing the last bits of loose ice. She had done a fantastic job, even going as fast as she did.

"Is she almost done?" Marinette asked as the class crowded at the base of the driveway. They couldn't really all hang around the corner without risking getting in Alix's way (or getting hit in the face by ice chips), so they had to be content with getting reports from Alya and Max, who had secured spots at the front of the group, and from Mylene, who was sitting on Ivan's shoulders and who could see over the fence at the base of the driveway.

"She's almost done chipping ice!" Max reported. "And- last piece up! Now she's switched to a shovel, and getting the walk cleared up! And...last shovel, and now she's clearing up the last pieces, and- done! Twelve minutes and twenty-three seconds."

Alix looked incredibly smug as she came back around the corner, ice bar slung over her shoulders. Sweat dripped down her face despite the chill, plastering bits of her pink hair to her face, but Alix didn't let her exhaustion diminish the bounce in her step.

"That was _rad_ ," Juleka told Alix as the group headed back up the driveway. "I've never seen anyone chip ice so fast."

"I'll be faster," Kim claimed loudly.

"You keep saying that, but I'm not seeing it," Alix shot back as she took the water bottle Rose offered and squirted juice directly into her mouth. "Why don't you show us what you're made of?"

* * *

It took another five minutes for them to gather in a Kim-approved spot- "safely out of the way" he claimed, which made Alix scoff.

"What, do you think you'll hit the ice so hard that it'll fly all the way across the yard?" Alix taunted, eyes locked on Kim as she munched on the cookies Rose had brought. The safety glasses she had worn during her ice-chipping spree were perched on top of her sweat-streaked hair. "You aren't that strong, muscleman."

Kim smirked as he set up his own tools. The shovels and ice pick leaned against the garage. "You'll see."

"Yeah, yeah, bla bla bla."

Kim smirked and flipped back the tarp, revealing two white bottles and a small red box. Everyone craned their necks to try to figure out what he had, but they were too far away and the labels were facing in the opposite direction. Whatever tricks Kim had up his sleeve were still unknown.

"I'm ready," Kim called, picking up one of the bottles and sticking the box in his pocket. He strutted over to the ice, a confident grin on his face. "It's time to show how the _masters_ do it."

"All right!" Max called back. He pushed his glasses back up his nose and consulted his phone. "And start in three...two...one...go!"

Kim opened the bottle and started emptying it onto the ice. A clear liquid squirted out, splashing as it hit the ground and coating the ice in a thin film. Kim made sure to cover all of the ice in the driveway, even dipping into the second bottle, before he turned to them with another wide grin.

"All right, keep your eyes open!" Kim called, heading back to the top of the driveway. "This is going to be _awesome._ " He tossed the bottles to the side of the driveway and pulled the box out of his pocket. Ivan and Mylene immediately craned their heads to see the label on the bottles. "And I'm gonna win this thing."

"It's _lighter fluid_ ," Ivan whispered to the group. "Oh my god, what is he gonna do?"

"He's gonna set the ice on fire!" Nino exclaimed, sounding more than a little alarmed. "And he used over a bottle of lighter fluid!"

Everyone scrambled back another step.

Kim pulled a match out of the matchbox- because what else could it be?- and lit it. He grinned at them again, then tossed the match onto the ice. Everyone gasped as it fell.

It spluttered out right before it landed.

"It landed on bare ice," Kim yelled to them, pulling out more matches. He lit them all at once, then crouched and dropped the matches a few centimeters from the ice. He yanked his hand back immediately and stepped back as the ice went up in flames.

Everyone gasped.

The flames spread quickly, flaring into the air. It looked awesome in the falling dusk, since the flames showed up so well. The whole driveway looked like it was on fire, and Kim was grinning. His plan was clear: melt the ice to slush with fire, and then just push the slush off of the driveway. For a few long moments, it looked like his plan would work. The flames jumped and quivered in the breeze but stayed fairly steady as they reached the farthest reaches of the driveway.

And then the flames dropped lower, and then they burned out. The ice stayed.

Kim's smile drooped a bit, and he prodded the ice with the ice chipper. It hadn't melted at all.

"The fire was not in contact with the ice for a sufficient amount of time to make any difference," Max noted, adjusting his glasses again. "Even if it was hotter and more focused like a flamethrower would be, the ice would still have required a longer period of time in order to soften and melt. Approximately fifteen seconds of low-grade heat would only create a small film of water on top of the fire."

"Please don't give Kim any ideas," Marinette pleaded. Everyone else nodded frantically.

"You've spent five minutes on the fire so far!" Alya called to Kim as he stared at the unmelted ice. "If you want to beat Alix's record, you really have to start moving it!"

Kim moved it.

Ice chips flew as Kim hacked frantically at the ice. He was clearly hitting hard as he could in an effort to make up for lost time, but it wasn't doing him much good. He was making holes in the ice, sure, but he was hitting at the wrong angle to knock out large chunks like Alix had. He had long since lost the cocky, self-assured grin he had worn earlier.

"Maybe you should have tried the fire _before_ you started bragging!" Alix yelled across the yard, clearly intent on giving Kim just as much grief as he had given her. "You're gonna lose by a landslide!"

Kim grimaced and brought the bar down with even more force. Ice splintered across the driveway.

"I'm gonna have so much fun thinking up my prize," Alix said smugly, watching with clear amusement as Kim's frantic ice-breaking increased in speed. "A foot rub, maybe, every day for a month? I think that sounds good."

There was a yelp from Kim at that.

"How many minutes are we coming up on, Max?" Alix called loudly so Kim could definitely hear. "Because it's been _forever_."

Max consulted his stopwatch. "Ten minutes, fifty-seven seconds- fifty eight, fifty nine-"

"Eleven minutes! And I was what, under twelve and a half? Hurry up Kim, you have to get the rest done in under a minute and a half!"

Kim swore.

* * *

Predictably, Alix won. Kim ceded to her after he passed seventeen minutes, though he still claimed that he would have won if he hadn't been inventive first.

"I took a risk," Kim bragged the next morning as Alix rolled her eyes. "And did you see how fast I was going? We should have restarted the watch when I started chipping the normal way, I would have won then."

"Actually," Max corrected, consulting his phone, "you wouldn't have. Alix checked in at 12 minutes 23 seconds. You started chipping shortly after the five minute mark and didn't finish at the time you ceded to Alix. Seventeen minutes minus five puts you at twelve minutes and you still would have had to remove the chipped ice from the part of the driveway that you had done, plus finish chipping the rest of the driveway, _plus_ the sidewalk. There is about a 0% probability that you could have done that in under 23 seconds."

Kim looked irritated. "I got flustered. Alix was distracting me. Otherwise-"

"Well you shouldn't have let me distract you then, should've you?" Alix taunted, smirking. "You were yammering at me and _I_ didn't let that slow me down."

Kim made a face.

"Have you decided on your prize, Alix?" Max asked, changing the subject before Kim could challenge Alix to anything else. "I know you mentioned something yesterday, but it was difficult to identify if you were serious about it."

Alix's smirk grew positively _vicious_. "Oh, I was serious about it all right. One foot rub every day for a month sounds absolutely fantastic. I'll be expecting the first one first thing after my roller derby practice today, Kim, so be sure you stick around. There'll be a penalty for skipping out." She grinned again, wide and taunting, before spinning around and heading to class.

"I _knew_ I should've used the flamethrower," Kim muttered morosely as Alix sauntered away down the hallway, the strut obvious in her step. Clearly she wouldn't be letting Kim forget about this for a long, long time and it was likely that she was going to make sure her feet were gross and sweaty _every. single. time._ It was obvious to everyone around that Kim was wishing that the contest had gone a whole lot differently. "I really, _really_ should've. It would've looked _awesome_ , and, and-"

"I would have _won_ then."

* * *

 **VERY IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE: DO NOT TRY THIS (or the flamethrower method) AT HOME. I actually got this idea because it was something my dad did once and it DOES NOT WORK. All you get is open flames that could potentially get very dangerous. **

On a more normal note, I would like to point out that as with most of my stories, this IS a one-shot and is therefore complete.

Please leave reviews! They make my day :)


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